2017 to 2018

It seems impossible to capture this year in pictures, but a picture says a thousand words. 

At the end of February, I went on a trip with a group from Trinity Western University to Alert Bay, a First Nations community off of Vancouver Island. I learned so much, especially learning what it means that the body of Christ includes all cultures, peoples, languages.

My favorite subject for two years finished up in the spring, Biblical Hebrew. I look forward to studying further in the future, but even the bit I have learned has changed my life. I have dreams regarding this that you will hear more about in the future!

There still aren't any words to describe May 23rd, and the experience we never prepared for of losing Dad. But any of you who have been reading this blog know what the journey has been like. We just miss him.

Dad's coworkers at Iridio - these people have become like family to us. We hurt together and remember together, and here we celebrated Dad's birthday together. 

This girl was a gift from God this summer, someone to talk with a adventure with and pick cherries with.

Ben and Lauren were a rock for me over the summer, two people who were so beautifully hospitable, willing to ask questions, and willing to be silent. I'm so lucky to know them.

My dear coworkers from Singer Hill who also were such a gift from God this summer. They made me look forward to getting up in the morning and knowing we would laugh and "accidentally" break scones and do life together.

Oh, I counted the days all summer to coming back to this little boy, Remi! 

This is my dorm, 2/3 Upper! I'm an R.A. for the 2017-2018 school year. It seemed overwhelming coming out of this heart-wrenching summer and knowing that the struggle was only just beginning. But these girls have been, yet again, God pouring out His love on me.

2/3 Upper - We managed to read the Bible together in 14 different languages! Man, God knows how to bless me.

Speaking of blessings = this family. They have been hope in flesh. They have been my Canada family, and more and more just family.

This was my favorite place to be this fall. Milo, thanks for causing your mom to be on maternity leave so that I can just pop in any time to be with you all. They have been with me through so much, the highs and lows, the laughter and tears, and everything in-between. They've allowed me to be part of their life, their struggles, their hearts as well.

OH Remi, every bit of your chromosomal enhancement has enhanced my life. Thank you for your joy, tears, cuddles, and crawl. 

I didn't know if I could be as crazy about any kid as I am about Remi, but Milo has stolen my heart. Those giggles, those smiles when I talk to you - I'm in.

Yeah, Rem.

And Kelly, oh Kelly has been tangible hope. She has jumped into the pits with me. And she has pulled me into the light.   

Her intentionality overwhelms me, her insight marvels me, her passion impassions me. I want to be with her and like her.  

And so it came to Christmas, the first one without Dad. It was hard. But it was more necessary than ever to remember that Jesus is hope, and hope fulfilled. God keeps His promises, and He promises and end to all crying and death. He promises that He will dwell with us.

And so these five are everything.

Sisters and Star Wars. Can it get better? 

2017. Some people are in a hurry to leave crappy years behind. But I'm not. Even though this has been the most painful year of my life, I don't want it to go away too fast. Dad is there. And we miss him so much.



But God is still with me. He is my first and last, my future and past. He will continue, and this coming year will take me closer to Him, I know. So it is worth it.



2018. In you, I want to know God more. I want to praise Him in the middle of the questions, before the victory. I want to know hope more, peace more, joy more, and love more. I want to know Jesus more.



And more than that, He wants me. I believe. And so I move ahead sad but confident in the knowledge that each moment forward is a moment closer to Jesus.