embracing the memories

Long story short, a counselor helped me realize this week that in my stern, serious, tense, angry, "this-is-so-unfair" stance on my grief, I have actually disconnected myself with the things he taught me, the gifts he gave me, the memories I can cherish. So this weekend I took the time to just go through all the photos I could find on facebook, reading all his posts, letting them bring up lots of tears that mostly transitioned slowly into laughter and smiles - not completely, but that's how it should be. So here are a few of the photos that made me cry and made me smile, mostly at the same time. 

Maybe your grief is similar, or very different. Maybe like me you also need to be encouraged to see the gift of what was, the gift that you still carry with you. It won't take away the grief, sadness, or anger; it shouldn't. But I don't want to be the kind of person who shuts my loved one out of my heart and mind because of the pain. I want to be the person who chooses to be shaped by them, despite the pain. And gosh, I sure got the best guy to be shaped by. I love you, Dad!